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Jen Lancaster, author of Jeneration X, interviews Jenny Lawson about Lets Pretend This Never Happened

Lancaster: You appear to have a soft spot for dead, stuffed creatures, particularly if theyre clad in bowler hats or acting out a scene--please explain.

Lawson: My father is a professional taxidermist, so its not like I had a fighting chance. And besides, I think the real question here is, who wouldnt be interested in ferrets in cancan dresses? Old anthropomorphic taxidermy is fascinating and Ive collected an entire menagerie of creatures that make up my personal posse. Cuban pirate alligators, Shakespearean mice, heavily armed squirrels, vampire-slaying ducklings. Im not sure how you say no to those. My husband can, but Im fairly sure theres something not right about him. Anyone who can turn his nose up at the Last Supper constructed of Victorian kittens has a problem. I suspect its because hes a Republican.

Lancaster: Who would you say is more powerful, The Bloggess Army or the KISS Army? Compare and contrast.

Lawson: My gut says the Bloggess Army is a bit more intimidating because we dont dress up like kitties, but Id probably still pick the KISS Army because Gene Simmons scares the shit out of me. Plus, my fans are less of an army and more of a collection of misfit minions looking to have a good time. Actually, now that I think about it, theres probably a lot of crossover with the KISS Army. We should host a potluck together.

Lancaster: Can you believe some people dont know what a confidence wig is?

Lawson: Right?! Its shocking how often I walk in with one and I hear people whispering about the poor cancer patient that just walked in. Im not a cancer patient, people. I just wear a wig to increase confidence. Plus, if I really mortify myself, I can just run to the bathroom, throw away the wig, and come back in and ask everyone who invited the crazy blonde that just crawled out of the bathroom window. There is no downside.

Lancaster: Whats it going to take for Nathan Fillion to send you a photo of himself holding a ball of twine?

Lawson: I think its going to take Nathan Fillion holding a ball of twine. Ive offered him thousands of dollars and he still rebuffs me. I have no idea what the hold up is, but I can only imagine that Nathan Fillion is allergic to either twine or to bringing smiles to the faces of strange women who really arent asking for that much, Nathan.

Lancaster: Complete this sentence: An oversized metal chicken

Lawson: Means never having to say youre sorry. Because its not towels.

Lancaster: Snooki or Kim Kardashian?

Lawson: Alphabetically, or in order of who is most likely to fuck up the youth of America? Because those are two different answers. Or possibly they arent, now that

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